(what I didn't like about) I'll Be Your Drill, Soldier novel

I think I'm going to make a habit of taking something out of a novel I read or movie I watched and write about it. I'm slowly discovering that I really like doing that so why not. There are so many things that can be overlooked in something and I am the first to admit that if I would have read this novel over ten years ago, when it first came out, I might have been head over heels, but since I only read it now, after seeing and learning some things, I'm all the way on the other side of the ruler. 

There are three major things I didn't like in this novel and I will write about them in the order I encountered them. So, shall we?

Ah, but before, I am going to shamelessly, again, drop a link to the review I wrote on Yaoi Otaku about the novel written by Crystal Rose (no doubt a pseudonym that should have made me think twice), and since we're here I am mentioning that in this post I am going to go more in depth on some of the things I wrote in the review. 

Now that we got that out of the way, again, shall we?

A bit of background

Ryan Gracin decides to join the army after losing support from his parents when he comes out as gay to them. His drill sergeant, Phillip Grabowsky (also nicknamed as Big Daddy in a big way, nickname that was promptly forgotten after his appearance) is the hottest guy Ryan ever laid eyes on and it's going to be difficult for both of them to keep focused. 

And now that we all know what this is about, let's see what's wrong with it. 

(warning: light spoilers)

Like a girl

I don't think I ever rolled my eyes as often as I did reading this. I laughed a few times, generally the story was entertaining, but it could have been so, so much better without all the "girl" references thrown around. I even considered going back and counting just how often someone has been compared to a girl if it wouldn't have been such a pain. 

Here I am, reading about some manly men, toughened by the army and next thing they "moan like a girl" or someone wants "to run to his truck like a girl" and someone is feeling "like a 16 year old girl". First of all, what cis man knows how a 16 year old girl feels like? And why did the author feel the need to compare everything to a girl? I'll tell you why, because the author doesn't know that guys can, in fact, moan as a man, or feel something like a man. Maybe they could be taken back in time and remember of that time in highschool and they'd feel like, obviously, a boy. The point is, no, guys don't do anything like girls do, they do it as boys. 

We definitely don't need gender norms, or whatever is perceived as 'girly', stamped on a guy. Like, dammit, have you ever heard a guy moan? There's nothing "like a girl" there, it's powerful, maybe husk, and hot as fuck.

Sexual harassment much?

The first time Ryan met Phillip's family, friends or anyone whatsoever, the first thing they would say upon seeing him was "you're hot". Everyone from Phillip's ex, to the wife of a mate, to the mate himself, to even their dogs if they had any. No worries, with Phillip that was a given since it was made clear in the first few pages after we met him. Of course he's not. Not only hot, he's a god, he's Superman. So hot. 

Going back to Ryan, the poor guy, he didn't even get a greeting, no hello, no how are you, nothing. He only got "you're hot". I felt uncomfortable reading that, I don't think anyone would ever feel otherwise when they'd go into a room full of your partner's family and friends and all they can say is "he's hot." Give the guy some credit! There are so many other things that make Ryan be Ryan, and hotness is actually not that up on the list. In those pages he was reduced to nothing more than a sex object and that makes my skin crawl.

Unrealistic emotions

If you didn't get my drift yet, it's unrealistic that someone, your SO's sister, brother, and pet fish would say "you're hot" the first time they see you, but that was not the only thing I thought to be unrealistic (and disturbing) in this novel. As I mentioned before, this is a military type of novel. Don't get me wrong, I don't know much about military apart from movies I watched or novels I read, but the last thing I would expect from a guy that spent up to 10 years in the army would be for him to not being able to control his emotions. 

This is a reality, people expect the worse, they see things we can't even imagine so I highly doubt it they would start shaking in anger upon overhearing a conversation in a supermarket or that they would start bawling their eyes when hearing that someone is hurt. These are tough guys, I'm not saying they wouldn't have this kind of a reaction, but they wouldn't start crying every 20 minutes over something. 

There is one quote, one string of words that made me stop in shock and even screenshot it because... But before I say anything about it, here's the quote: 

"they still were male enough that they didn't talk about their feelings" 

Do you see that? I don't even know where to begin on this. Should I start by being baffled at the use of the word male? Should I point out that apparently there's such a thing as being male enough? Should I write about how the author perpetuates the idea that you are not male enough if you talk about your feelings? And mind you, this comes after quite some emotional talks.

I had to type that quote while looking at the screenshot, checking every word to make sure I'm not somehow hallucinating. 

There are other things wrong here, I could go on, but I'll settle to that and I'm going to look back at the outstandingly high rating this novel has on goodreads. It's at 4.09/5 as I write this and I did check for the rating before reading, I wanted to read something good, so to everyone that rated so high... I don't even know what to say. I must be in the wrong here. But if I'm not, what the fuck?